What Allah wills..

Next week is the date of my viva, to upgrade from MPhil to PhD. If I pass, then i can continue with my study, if not, then Allah yang Maha Mengetahui. As i try to finish my slides, somehow I don't even know what I want to do. I have submitted my report 2 weeks ago, but now everything is blurry.

My decision to do PhD was really rezeki. At one point in my life I was trying everything, even auditioning for a place as a newsreader.. hehehe.. throughout that I was consistent with istikharah and prayer that Allah will show me the way, and somehow the road to PhD yang Allah permudahkan.. but tiada yg datang bergolek.. Susah juga nak dapatkan opportunity ini, I worked and tried and worked and tried, now tawakkal and hope for the best. Tapi ini semua rezeki dari Allah..


Doing PhD has been a dream of mine since like ever.. based on the stories of others, I realise how difficult it is.. and still being consistent with my istikarah and prayer, next week is the deciding date.

It's not easy juggling study and housework.. sometimes I wonder why Allah chose me to be here. Am I worthy? Can I do this? Is this really my path? I don't know.. i have next week to find out. Whatever God wills for me, I accept and redha. Semoga usahaku selama ini tidak sia-sia.. Amin.